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Idiot Wars Episode I... the Yanks Strike Back

we petition the obama administration to:

Immediately Ban the Deadly Videogame Known as "SkyRim" for The Safety of America's Youths.

Whereas videogaming has proven to cause social, ethical and health problems in people of all ages,

Whereas sexual perversion and homosexuality are threatening to destroy the Christian foundations on which this nation was built,

Whereas a new video game has just been created that far exceeds any others in the psychological and spiritual damage it does to teens,

We, the American people, today ask you,

1) To enact an immediate ban on the videogame known as "SkyRim" produced by Blizzard Entertainment.

2) To seize and destroy all copies already in public hands and erase its presence on the internet.

3) To prosecute the players of "SkyRim" to the fullest extent of the law.

4) To create a national database of videogame avatars and "screen names" so that teenagers can be better monitored.

Created: Nov 24, 2011
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Signatures needed by December 24, 2011 to reach goal of 25,000

24,987

Total signatures on this petition

13

It's no secret that I highly disapprove of those relatively few idiot Americans that set the trend for a global stereotype. These stupid bastards make the US a tragic joke in the eyes of the civilized world, and does nothing to rid the world of the idea that Americans are all hyper-Christian hicks who'll happily be offended at just about anything.

These particular idiots have had a go at just about everything I hold dear - rock and metal music haven't had an easy ride, and there's been no shortage of thick politicians attempting to ride an anti-videogame policy to success (This is mainly because no-one is easier to exploit than bad parents looking for a scapegoat).

But don't you fuck with Skyrim, America. Don't even go there.

Can you imagine if the beleaguered US government just decided to ditch worrying about Afghanistan and the fact that pretty much every teen who isn't playing Skyrim is currently part of the Occupy movement to try and take this seriously?

"I'm sorry, what? You want us to get rid of the one thing keeping teenagers at home? Fuck you, Tennessee"

I'll end this rant here, but rest assured America, I have plenty more bile to douse your idiots with.

I'm just too busy playing videogames right now.

-L